Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
soo... how was my night?
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
