remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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