We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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