just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize