420 ftw
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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