When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
