Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
