On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
