Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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