Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
