Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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