sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
