so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
