why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Randomize