Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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