At least make sure they are 18
Why
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
