i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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