All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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