Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I'm too high and old for this...
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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