I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
