I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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