Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
