he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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