hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
