I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Randomize