Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize