oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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