Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Too much gin, very little bucket
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize
