She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
