She's JV to your varsity
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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