i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
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