It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
