Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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