It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
