Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
