She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
im on a boat
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