so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
My bed is full of blood and feathers
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Randomize
