Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
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