I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
