he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize