I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
