I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
