i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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