Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
