Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
