Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
