hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Randomize
