Sponge bath it is.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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