just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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