That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
