He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
No I am not eating basil off your cock
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
