Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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