he wants to bone in the snuggie
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
